This part 1 post on different layers to alleviate stress in your life looks at what stress actually is, and what you need to let go of for lasting impact. Subscribe to the Blog to read Part 2 – techniques and strategies.

The one thing you need to let go of to alleviate stress in your life.

This is so interesting, so fascinating to me – dealing with stress has helped me get to know myself on such deep levels, and really uncover who I am and how I function. I call this knowledge about myself spiritual psychology.  In this weird way, dealing with stress through this work has helped me fall in love with who I am, who I really am – and that’s a whole different story, a whole other layer. A whole other dimension really.

You can do so many different things to alleviate stress. Some are more and some are less helpful, some are helpful short term and others long term. Obviously, the deeper you go into the roots, the more long term you get to have effects.

What IS Stress?

What is Stress? It happens when you disagree with what is happening. That’s its most basic explanation. You disagree with what’s happening. Like, you have to be alone during Thanksgiving – you don’t like it, and so you’ll have a horrible time – you do like it, it’s all good. Or anything else. You get stressed about Christmas because you are the only one cooking Christmas dinner and nobody is helping. Or your brother is bringing the damn dog when he comes visiting and then insists on talking about politics. So, you have this internal position of disagreement, and that’s not in line with what is happening, and so you experience stress. It’s that simple. 

When we realise this, like deeply realize it, we come into immense power. Why?

Because now, all of a sudden, I can influence my stress 100%. I can influence it because its cause is inside of me, not outside. And it’s all a shift of focus. 

Stress is in your mind – but only 100%.

So, I know, when I say things like this, peoples’ minds jump to the worst possible scenario, like they are being killed, or their kids dying, and argue that surely it doesn’t apply here. Well, it does, and people who do this work, The Work of Byron Katie, can testify to it. AND, it is learnable. It’s a skill. Being happy, powerful, and stress-free in your life is a skill. It’s a learnable skill.

Learning to alleviate stress in your life

When you learn a new skill, you don’t try your hand immediately at the most difficult task. Like when you learn playing piano, you don’t start playing Beethoven or Mozart. You start playing twinkle twinkle little star – something easy. And then slowly, you begin to learn, your skill improves. It’s the same with this work. You start with some everyday stresses, like being alone because of COVID, or your boss doesn’t like you. You investigate. Fairly quickly, you’ll begin to get it, and your stress levels drop. Eventually, they are hardly noticeable anymore. It’s the most amazing thing. Life becomes so beautiful. You get to see that you are so held and supported in your life, it’s incredible. You never get to experience that depth of gratitude when you hold on to your stress.  

What are you willing to let go of?

There’s just one thing you really have to let go of when you do this work. This is the biggest hurdle. Can you guess what you need to let go of?

It’s a lateral thinking thing and not so intuitive. It’s surprising.

You need to let go of being right. 

When you get to the place where right and wrong have disappeared from your life, stress will not touch you anymore. It has no more power over you. You’re home inside your mind; home inside your true being. And that makes you home in your heart, and home anywhere in the world, whether you live in a palace or a shack, whether your body is strong or in a wheelchair, whether you are alone for Christmas, or with your family, and all goes well, or not. 

On the other side of your stress, you get to grow into who you really are, totally and utterly. It’s powerful, it’s clear, it’s completely self-centered, and at the same time incredibly kind. Without stress, we are actually drawn to live in the service of others and feel such gratitude for being able to do that. Really, letting go of being right will turn your whole world upside down. 

Read the Part 2 here – Strategies.